I wish I could write and just keep on writing. spill my heart out. I'm tired of trying to suppress my feelings. I'm tired of keeping it all in, trying to keep myself contained just for all of you out there who care. But I can't take it any more. This is the limit. I want to shout it all out. Let go of it.. cry rivers until all is dry but alas I cant because im supposed to be mature.

   I want to tear you to pieces but I have to be nice and patient though u don't deserve it. Not at all. I don't want to be a grown up for now.. I wish I could go back..when I could cry with no fear, when I could curl in my mum's lap and sleep peacefully.. I wish ... I wish... I wish... And how I wish that I didn't wish... :(

   But.. things are not as I wish.. and so I have to wipe my tears.. I can't allow them to flow.. no.. I have to  keep them hidden in my heart.. *sigh* :'( :'(