The images my mind creates these days... So beatuiful yet so tormenting...! The delicacy of flowers.. the morning dew shining like pearls. The bright and fresh colours! the wet grass.. the chirping of the birds.. the cool breeze..! The slight beam of sunshine creating a mesmerizing view...!!!!

   The sun burning the fragile petals... wilting them into nothingness.. engulfing the beauty of it... The breeze tuning furious, detaching the leaves.. throwing them mercilessly into the air.. tossing...! turning...! withering...! Everything perishes....

   If only I could paint this on a canvas... so heart breaking...


 ...... Bleargh!

   When words elapse you it is the time when the intensity of your feelings has gone beyond expression. Things left unsaid themselves tell a story. And in that story there are oceans of tears and hot lava bubbling and burning under the ground with no escape. When the ocean overflows Tsunami comes and when lava erupts people burn. Life comes to an end... All is silent... cold... dead...

Unwanted are your souls
cause I for myself now suffice
No words to say or feelings to pour
cause the gashes of my heart
have left a bottomless hole
and my sorrow no longer over flows
But in my voice at times you may see
the hint of rivers behind my eyes that roar.

 

   Sometimes the tears don't come and yet you still feel as if you have been crying for a very long time. The guilt of everything you have ever done burdens your shoulders and no matter how hard you try you can't throw it off. You carry it around until you fall, fall to the ground on your knees and beg God to forgive you.

   But things cling to you not willing to let go. No matter how long you repent the guilt remains. What could be a greater punishment then being so aware of the wrong, remorse is indeed the most powerful and painful feeling of this world but it will be rewarding in the other world. At least I regret it... that's the first step to goodness... and I believe once you start walking this path Allah will definitely assist you and help you throughout until you reach your destination.

With empty hands and barren eyes,
A man moves on from this domicile.
Regardless of the wonders he here achieved,
no power nor strength or status he takes.
but lies in the dust among his many more.
With deeds to bring light or burn his soul!

You know I had decided I wouldn't write anymore personal posts but your words really moved me to tears. I'm feeling so bad. I'm such a pervert. I really hate myself even more now.

You know you are great. Seriously, you are very nice and good. Way too good for any of us. It's an honour to have such a friend. And it's no true what you think. Trust me. :(:( And don't ever say any such thing again please??? Please :'(

I want to make you believe that you are worth a lot. But I'm just so so so sad and close to tears, You made me cry :( made me realize once again how bad I am... Its not you but the others who are not worth it.

...... :'(

When all the lights go out
I can see you shine like a star
you  take my hand
and help me out of the dark

But when it gets too bright
mistakenly I overlook you.
I don't want you to get lost
in this over brightness,
So now I treasure the dark!